Ayla’s Birth Story- August 2021
Born at 41+ - Spontaneous labour, homebirth into water.
By sharing my positive birth story I wish to ‘do my bit’ to help change the [often fearful] birth narrative that is so present in society today. Please note, I didn’t take any of my decisions lightly, I did my research and found a birth team that supported me. I believe in the power of choice and there sure are plenty of birthing options available, to suit each and every one of us, this just felt right for me.
I was so excited about birthing, I had read beautiful books (Ten Moons and Bountiful, Beautiful, Blissful) that made my heart sing , completed a Hypnobirthing course with Chloe Thornton and had been gracefully supported through pregnancy by our private midwife Leisa (via the Birth House).
Baby girl had been growing well, my bump measuring 41cm from top to bottom, my body was feeling incredible, I had looked after myself so well throughout my 41+ weeks, I had made adjustments as I needed, prioritising myself and bump along the way.
So week 41 arrived and I was getting bombarded with texts about ‘is she here yet’, ‘when will they induce you’ cue removing myself from these questions and answers so I could just trust she would come when she was ready. Chloe had said to me ‘let labour find you’ and Leisa had reassured that it was a good thing for bubba to continue to grow inside. I was not concerned. And within hypnobirthing philosophy, any time passed the guess date (the due date is termed this, as it really is a guess) is actually bonus time, so we relished the time and the extra walks at the beach (in my case waddles). Everyday we watched a American Pie, and we ended up seeing all the spin offs, gosh they really milked that series.
Cue, 8/8 a new moon, a new beginning, I had a feeling she would arrive on this date, the morning, lunchtime, arvo came and went and then early signs of labour started, and this time I knew they were not practice runs (like I had experienced for a couple of weeks). We phoned Leisa the midwife and she was on standby and encouraged that I went to bed and relaxed, so I did, Craig and I didn’t get much sleep as each surge slowly rolled around, by 6am we called again and Leisa was on her way.
Part of me thought the baby was just going to ‘pop out’, I had drank all the raspberry leaf tea, eaten all the dates (I say this in jest) and was mentally prepared BUT that was not in store for me, for us. Part of me realises this is because I am an overthinker, perhaps I was overthinking everything which prevented my ability to surrender. But also as I had been thinking ‘I hope it doesn’t happen too quickly that don’t have time to process’. Famous last words/thought as baby girl and I sure got to make the most of each stage of labour.
Leisa arrived and this was the start of the surrender, I knew I couldn’t without her being there.
The day was a dance of riding the waves of the surges, in our lounge room, which was set up with the birth pool, a mattress, sofa, birth ball and an alter (a mix of photos, affirmations, rose quartz (that had been at our wedding) and plants representing life). Throughout the day a mix of hypnobirthing tracks, meditative music and chanting were played. I remember Lily (our Airedale/first baby) kept checking on me, when I look back on photos, it’s incredible to see her support, there for cuddles, there at my feet, there to spoon if I was laying down. As the labour progressed she was requiring her own space, (turns out she was quite traumatised by the primal noises I was making and it took some time for our relationship to get back to normal post birth).
One of the main reasons for birthing at home was because I really wanted to ‘get in the zone’ and it felt like the best place to be able to do so, I had all my home comforts and home felt like my safest place to birth. As I progressed deeper and deeper into ‘the zone’ my memory gets a little more fuzzy but I remember;
I remember concentrating on breathing (utilising hypnobirthing techniques for the different stages of labour),
I remember sniffing a cloth with essential oils to support my senses and system,
I remember being fed blueberries and banana and being served ‘labour aid’ and coconut water through a straw,
I remember alternating between the earth and the birth pool, at times things felt too intense on the ‘earth’ the surges experienced on the toilet were the most intense, the birth pool was my safe space to ride out the sensations, so I spent a lot of time in there, which may have slowed the labour BUT felt like the pace bub and I needed.
I remember Craig supporting me through every surge, by holding my hands, or grounding my shoulders, or agreeing with my affirmations which I often spoke out loud ‘my body knows how to do this’ > ‘yes Sammy it does’, ‘every surge is one step closer’ > ‘yes, another step closer’, ‘I can do anything for 60 seconds’ > ‘you absolutely can’.
I remember Craig taking the clock away so I had no concept of time.
I remember the space Leisa was holding, not intrusive, just trusting of my body to birth, but 100 percent there if I needed to throw her a glance or reach for a reassuring hand. And that’s the thing about a water birth, the bath actually allows the woman to be in her own zone, her own space, without interruption or intervention or constant checks, I so valued this and found it very powerful.
I remember the surges getting more intense and more frequent,
I remember starting to say ‘no, no, no’ as intensity built, but I caught myself resisting so I turned my ‘no’s’ to ‘yes’ to welcome the sensations.
I remember suddenly expressing that ‘this is hard, I can’t do this’ but before Craig and Leisa could respond I was already correcting myself ‘I didn’t mean that, yes I can, I know I can’ something they laugh about now.
I remember our second midwife arriving, and feeling like this was another positive step. She rested in the bedroom, not to crowd me and the space, but there, ready and willing to surround when needing to.
I remember time passing and me wondering if baby was even making her way down, so I stuck a finger in and felt her head (the biggest relief!!!) I shouted ‘I feel the head, I feel the head’. Absolute elation, one of my favourite memories from the birth, the soft but hard head making its way down. Things ramped up again from there.
I remember the primal sounds coming out of my mouth with every surge, there was no keeping me quiet. The head makes its way down but also bobs back up again,
I remember shouting ‘the head, the head’ then experiencing a surge and then ‘it’s gone back up again’ this repeated so many times.
I remember asking what happens when the head comes out, ‘the shoulders, then the body’ then getting back in the zone, then the head crowned and released, I then begged ‘please have my shoulders, please have my shoulders’ (I am small and slight, the opposition of my 6 foot broad husband), also one of our favourite memories, Craig can’t believe I was cracking a joke while baby’s head was hanging out, but to me it was no joke! The shoulders released, then it took a further surge to release the whole body, the plan for Craig to be in the birth pool to ‘catch her’ but upon debriefing ‘there was no way I was getting in that birth pool after all the poop I scooped out’ oh yes,
I remember the poop, so much poop!
Anyway, Leisa said something to encourage me to reach down and grab my baby, the most incredible feeling finding her body and lifting her up. My plan was to bring her to my heart and give her a big cuddle/wiggle which helps release them from being startled BUT the cord was short, turns out she needed to be at my belly. In hindsight, as she could only be at my belly; my power centre, this will always remind me of the power, strength and determination to birth in this way, and remind me what I am capable of, I think she needed me to honour and acknowledge this.
There she was, our precious baby, hubby had been shedding tears (most likely of relief) since the head started to release. And I was in complete awe/elation of this beautiful baby that was in my hands, so awake and aware just glancing at me with big beautiful eyes. The memory still brings me to tears. At the time I was the only one not crying. I was full of happy hormones and everyone else had gone through the experience with lack of sleep, feeling relief and so happy to see her face.
My baby, born August 2021, intervention free at 4 kilos.
Huge thank you to;
My husband for supporting the birth of my dreams.
Leisa Gittings for her incredible and empowering care throughout pregnancy, birth and beyond.
The team at The Birth House for all they did for us and enable for others.
Chloe Thornton for educating me to experience an empowered birth through her Hypnobithing course and ongoing encouragement.
Lucy, for jumping in to care for Lily when we needed her.
And all those who have gone before me and support me.
It is my wish that no woman experiences a traumatic birth experience. This is occurring far too often due to unnecessary medical interventions, unnecessary being the word. Medical interventions are only required when necessary and if a woman opts in after being educated on pros and cons.
Chloe Thornton is an AHPRA Registered Midwife, Registered Nurse, Birth Mentor and Hypnobirthing Australia™ Certified Practitioner.
She provides group classes virtually to families across the country each month and also has a small number of spaces available for private bespoke sessions online or in-person. She can be contacted by email at chloelouisethornton@outlook.com.
You can learn more about her Hypnobirthing Australia™ classes here.